Small Affirmations...

Being a parent is tough.  There are no raises, promotions, titles, or year-end bonuses, so it's tough to figure out when to give yourself a pat on the back.  I often find myself mired in the refereeing and daily trials of parenthood, just trying to get everyone fed, clothed, cleaned, and to their respective activities and schools.  I am guilty too, of forgetting that I am not perfect, so why do I expect my kids to always be perfect?  There's nothing wrong with setting the bar high, but within reason! 

The last couple of weeks, I've had enough "huh" moments that I think I can say, with some small amount of certainty, that I might be doing something right.  Not everything, for I am surely scarring them in ways that will take a therapist many thousands of dollars to un-do at some point in their futures, but something, which is better than nothing...

AJ (21 months):  I sneezed this morning and he stopped what he was doing (running down the hall), looked at me and said, "Bess noo, Mama."  Then he resumed his sprint, until the wall stopped him. 

Nora (age 4):  Cleaned my truck, because it was "dirty and she wanted to surprise me".  Or should I say, cleaned the front grill and headlights, because that was all she could reach.  With a scrub brush and half a bottle of Palmolive dumped into a beach bucket.

Brady (age 7):  Used the word "gossamer" in a sentence, in the proper context.  Seriously?  Gossamer?  Didn't that word go out of use in the 1700s?  On a separate, but no less profound note (for him), he's made it through the first week of school, getting up at 6:30am, plus three nights of football camp (2 hours/evening in 100 degree heat) without whining, complaining, or having a meltdown. 

Brennan (age 9):  Gave me one of the highest nods a "tween" can: held my hand, gave me a kiss and a hug, and said "Love you, too" on her way into 4th grade orientation.  It was also her idea that we stop by "GiGi's" house on our walks up in Michigan (I would have stopped in anyway, but thought it was sweet that Brennan said it first).  How awesome is it that a 9 year old thinks her Great Grandma is fun to visit? 

Of course, you may notice that "I" am taking all the credit for their affirmation of "my" outstanding parental abilities.  I'll be happy to write the next post on all of Mark's bad habits they seem to be modelling.......  ; )

Oh, that was just me again, forgetting that I am not perfect.  Darn it!

Be Careful Where You Put Your "Things"

The kids and I recently visited a friend's house for an overnight stay.  We both have four children and it was a rainy day, so they were working very hard on staying busy and not fighting. 

We finally caved in and put on a movie.  About that time, my friend's oldest daughter, walked over and whispered something into her ear.  While I couldn't hear what she said, I could tell by my friend's face that it was something unexpected.

Some time later, she and I were in her master bedroom setting up a pack n play when her daughter rounds the corner into her room, and heads for the closet.  She was stopped in her tracks and reminded that "Mommy's and Daddy's Room is not the playroom, and there are lots of other places to play, so find somewhere else to go."

Brennan was lurking outside the bedroom door, I believe, awaiting the daughter's return, so we told them both to skedaddle.  After they were well on their way, my friend starts laughing and tells me that earlier, her daughter had asked where the book of "naked exercises" was.  It doesn't take a great leap of imagination to figure out what the book was about.

Apparently, over the years my friend had acquired a book of "365 Sex Positions for 365 Days of the Year".  She'd found it earlier in the week out on the closet floor, open but face down (it had been stowed away in the top drawer of a lingerie chest).  Not a pornographic work, it was more along the lines of "The Joy of Sex" with artful (yet very detailed) illustrations and instruction.  Definitely not for the inquiring minds of a 7 and 9 year old.

We surmised that the girls' curiosity was piqued, so they were sneaking in to explore a little more of the book of "naked exercises."  Unfortunately, their attempt was thwarted by The Moms.

Note to parents:  be careful where you put your things...you never know who might find them - or with whom they might shared!

And All Was Right With the World...

We just returned from our annual sojourn up North.  By North, I mean a 16 hour drive to the sandy shores of Lake Huron in Michigan.  I drove to Pittsburgh with the kids, spent the night with my brother and his family, drove to Cleveland, spent the night with an old friend and her family, then picked up Mark at Cleveland Hopkins Int'l Airport (lucky duck to slide in with only 4 1/2 hours remaining!!) and headed North on US 23.  Phew!  I am exhausted just by recalling that trip (the kids were all very, very good for me in the car though, it must be noted!). 

Northern Michigan is my happy place.  Walking the beaches with my kids looking for Petosky Stones and "sea" glass, snorkeling over the weed bed where we fish to see what species of fish are calling it home each summer, and walking down to Taylor's Motel and Cottages to get an ice cream cone (just as my Dad and his 4 brothers did when they were kids) are just a few of the simple delights that await us each summer. 

And while the sunrises and sunsets make truly magnificent scenery, they are but a backdrop to the memories we create with our family.

My Mom, recalling her conversation with Nora (and the subject of my last post) ordered a butterfly cake and surprised the kids with it.  Nora was absolutely delighted, and gasped, "oh, I've always wanted a butterfly cake!"

Thanks, Mom, you really hit the ball out of the park on that one!  Not to mention the whole crumbled-Doritos-on-honey-nut-cheerios-for-breakfast thing....
(the picture is of my Mom fishing one evening with Brennan, Brady and their cousin Graden in her "favorite" little rowboat...Brady hooked into "Walter" the huge, elusive, Walleye of the Weed bed, but he broke the line before they could get him into the dollar store butterfly net they'd brought on board to help them land their catch...)

My Dad had the kids create their own colored crawler harnesses for walleye fishing (they caught 4 walleye)!  An avid hunter and fisherman, it is important that he pass down his love for outdoor sports.  "Puppa" as the kids call him, is a special person.  He's just got a way with kids that is endearing, unique, and genuine. 

Mark came up with a very realistic map and buried Pirate's Treasure that they "stumbled" upon while scouring the beach with metal detectors.  The kids were all jumping up and down on the beach shouting "we're going to be famous!"

While my sister was not able to join us this year, my brother, his wife and their two children did come.  The kids all enjoyed spending time with their cousins.  Brady in particular, enjoyed having his cousin Graden, as a full time playmate.  He is generally surrounded by girls (AJ apparently doesn't count as a boy yet), so that was a great break for him. 

That beach is one of the few I know of these days, where you can have a beach fire.  While it doesn't get dark in the summer until after 10:30pm, at night, the stars are absolutely magnificent in both number and brightness.  We saw two comets (or perhaps it was trash from the Russian Space Station?) that were the brightest, boldest streaks across a night shy that I've ever seen.  It's was like Bill Cosby's Magic Pen on Picture Pages... 

At night, you can see the camp fires dot the shore as far as you can see.  It's magical.

We are fortunate that my Grandma, or "G.G." (for Great-Grandmother to the kids), is still alive and well.  So much so, that she drives herself to and from East Lansing (her home) and Au Gres (her lake house and about 1/2 walk along the beach from my parents house) throughout the summer.  Did I mention that she'll be 94 this Halloween?  Incredible.  The kids all enjoy her, and Brennan in particular always requests to stop in and visit G.G. when we go for a walk on the beach.  Sharp as a tack, with an Irish wit, she has an endless knowledge of family history and colorful stories of the cast of characters that comprise our family tree.

Hopefully, you all will have the opportunity to take some time this summer and enjoy the simple pleasures in life. 

Slow down, get rid of some of the clutter, minimize the chatter, and make some memories. 

I, for one, recommend Northern Michigan (anywhere), but if you can't get there, any place where you can look up and see the milky way will do.